If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
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