HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
