You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Randomize
