ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
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