if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
