all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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