I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
