I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
