My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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