Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Randomize
