Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
and she was petting her beer can
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Randomize
