I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I enjoy the company of your penis
Randomize
