The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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