my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Randomize
