Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
i love accidental penises.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize