I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
We don't watch enough power rangers
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
