Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Randomize
