So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize
