Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Randomize
