so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
