Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
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