Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
My vagina just recognized that song.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
