He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
