talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Randomize
