Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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