Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
