dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Randomize
