He is an equal opportunity slut.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
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