I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
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