I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
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