WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
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