I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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