I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
