i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
