Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
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