BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
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