we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Randomize
