this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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