I want to walk on stilts...naked
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Randomize
