Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
We had sex on a dog bed..
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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