I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Randomize
