I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
You need a sexual gate keeper
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Randomize
