her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
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