The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
