I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
