Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
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