i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
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