her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
