Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
