so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
Randomize
