I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
